Calm/Peaceful : Solitude
Water falls in droplets on the window pane.
The room is quiet.
The clock, it ticks.
It's driving me insane.
Solitude is loneliness from inside here, where I sit.
No words to speak.
No words to hear;
It's just that maddening tick.
Waterfalls spilling amid lush greenery.
Quiet 'cept for the water's rush
And the chirp of birds;
Indeed, a change of scenery.
Solitude is happiness from this rock on which I'm planted.
No words to speak.
No words to hear.
Returning sanity I am granted.
The comments are owned by the poster. We aren't responsible for their content.
| Poster | Thread |
|---|---|
| blissfulmami | Posted: 2010/6/25 22:31 Updated: 2010/6/25 22:31 |
Why go anywhere else?   Joined: 2007/8/25 From: USA north east Posts: 374 |
 Re: SolitudeThis is very vivid and I love the colors you use.
"...droplets on the window pane." "...loneliness from inside here "Waterfalls spilling amid lush greenery." "chirp of birds" It sounds like a peaceful rainy day... except for that bothersome clock, hahaha. ~Blissful |
| GoliathAssassin | Posted: 2010/5/19 1:15 Updated: 2010/5/19 1:15 |
Poetry is my existance   Joined: 2006/3/30 From: Detroit, Michigan. Left behind... Hickory and 8 mile for the suburban grind... Posts: 2200 |
Re: Solitude I think the moral of the story is one that a melancholy person like me can really appreciate. You obviously gave great attention to form. I'd have expected something a little more "drawn out" and "bleeding heart," but it was very well written nonetheless.
|
| Retribution101 | Posted: 2010/2/10 7:48 Updated: 2010/2/10 7:48 |
Lead Moderator   Joined: 2005/9/16 From: Behind You! Posts: 2730 |
Re: Solitude I liked the contradiction between the 2 stanzas. I felt that in the first, though it was almost the same kind of silence, the surroundings you experience it in can make all the difference. A lonely silent house causes melancholy, but a lonely silent secret place can bring serenity! Loved this!
|
| SirichJ | Posted: 2010/2/6 9:51 Updated: 2010/2/6 9:51 |
Poetry is my existance  Joined: 2004/8/27 From: England, UK Posts: 2777 |
Re: Solitude I liked the 2nd verse a lot more than the first which I found a bit samey done before kind of thing, but you definitely have a way with words :)
|